Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Since Hil brought it up...

If you read Hil's comment in my last post and I quote: "I remember the first time I stayed at Haley and Nate's place. They were the most caring hosts ever. Then I was warned not to use the "nakey blankey." That was the funniest thing I'd ever heard and loved Haley forever for being unembarrassed that they had a nakey blankey and that her new sis-in-law and bro-i-l knew about it. So awesome." End of quote

Yes, I have a nakey-blankey and I'm not sorry. My folks gave me the blanket when I left on my mission (not that you really need a blanket in Phoenix). After which the blanket followed me through my single years as a reminder of good times and fond memories. After Nate and I were married we both gave each other the blankey space we needed. I wasn't to touch his baby blanket (yep, he still has one...don't tell him I told you) and he wasn't allowed borrow my nakey-blankey no matter how much he begged.

There's something comforting about having a cheap, scratchy Mexican horse blanket to wrap around my naked porcelain tushy before I put on my undies. I think it's even more comforting for my guests to know that the blanket they've snuggled under wasn't, just hours early, being used as a over-the-shoulder toga/loincloth (I was playing a game I like to call Greek Goddess).

I hope none of my understanding blogging BFF's are judging me. Would you rather I used any and every blanket I own whenever I wanted to. Just think it would be like playing Russian Roulette when you stayed at my house. Or on the other hand, it could be like a Elvis throwing his stanky sock into an adoring crowd. Maybe all of my guests would dive, tackle, kick, bite, pull hair and give wedges to be able to touch the infamous Haley Nakey-Blankey. Piece by piece it would be ripped apart so everyone could take a little bit of the nakey-blankey home with them.
Over the years the nakey-blankey would slowly be ripped down to a 4 x 4 inch square. That wouldn't discourage me though, I would carefully spread it out and settle my booty right in the center.

As a closing thought, I would highly recommend that every household has at least one nakey-blankey and if you can afford it, one nakey-blankey per person. I guess you could have one huge family nakey-blankey but that's just a little weird, you think?
There will be less fighting and more family bonding with a nakey-blankey to help keep the peace in your house. If you don't believe me, try it yourself. Please use a little common courteousy and warn your guests about the Nakey-Blankey, after all that's just the good Christian thing to do.


Ali said...

I was totally wondering about this! And I'm so glad that you told me what it was because I had some SERIOUS bad ideas floating through my brain. But is it JUST a post shower blanket? And why do you wear a blanket around before you get dressed? Is it just tradition now? I was just wondering.

Anyway, I have to tell you that I got the Shred video and my legs are killing me today. Marcelo sat and watched me do the exercises yesterday and he was like "don't go on your knees during push-ups" and I was like "JILLIAN SAYS THERE IS NO SHAME IN IT! LOOK! THAT REALLY SKINNY GIRL IS DOING IT TOO. . .SO YOU JUST SHUT THE HELL UP!" Yeah, I'm nice like that.

I'm excited my butt might someday be jiggle free

Colleen Marie said...

When the toothbrush first showed up, it was toted as "a great invention for personal hygiene. Every family should have one."
You know, I'm all for sharing socks, and sometimes deodorant, but I think the toothbrush and nakey-blankie should remain single user items.

hil said...

once again, i agree with Collen Marie. it's just so Haley to have a nakey-blankey and i love it! personally, i wouldn't even want to bask in my own nakey-blankey (most of us know of my deep rooted fear of germs and as Haley and i recently talked about, butts are always dirty, no matter how much you clean them), though i think it is a fabulous idea. and Ali, Frankie tried to throw down a shred "how to improve your form" suggestion and he paid for it all day long. ALL DAY LONG. what finally cured him was when he, himself did the video. tell Mar that if he thinks he's so fit, to try level 3. sit there eating popcorn and watch him start crying half-way through. see, it's easy to do a man push-up when you are a man, but try doing a Jillian side lift and i promise he will feel it for days. see, there are unofficially 3 genders: female, male, and Jillian, who seems to be an improved hybrid of the other two. i'm proud of you for joining the ranks of women who have to slowly lower themselves onto the toilet for days after their first shred.

Ali said...

YES!!! The toilet assistance!!! I'm like a freaking geriatric patient! Luckily my tub is RIGHT next to the toilet so I use that to ease myself down. Otherwise I might crash down onto the toilet and break through the floor.

Jillian is another species. A freakish species with killer abs.