More vacation pics (mostly of Darby)

No, I'm not playing favorites with my nieces. As soon as I go on a vacation with Kacey, I'll post a ton of pics of her on my blog. Until then here's some of my favorite pics of Darby Danae

Darby at the waterpark. I wish I would have gotten some pictures of her on the slide, talk about pure joy.

Darby playing with the puppies.
Yes, Darby is in a dog kennel.

Though Darby wasn't too sure about Lily at first, they became BFF after a few terrified first moments.
PS: That's Dustin on the side, he looks almost as cute as Darby when he's loving on his doggies.


Korean, it was so good.
-Darby, Hil, Frank, Cindy, Dustin, Jess, Nate, me

Here's Nate with Bear and Lily. Please note Nate's hair, now you know why he always wears a hat...

I'm not sure what gang sign he's flashing. It looks like a W to me and it's close to his face. I'm guessing: Wussy-Face....???

Natey-Poo and his niece Darby. She had him wrapped around her little finger the whole time.
Can you blame him?

A Week of Vacation

*I'll be posting more pictures over the next few days

Saturday 16th- We flew in to San Diego. Cindy flew in that night. Frank, Hil

and Darby drove from AZ.

Sunday- We slept in, drove 1 1/2 hours to Aunt Kelly and Uncle Gary's house. It was nice to meet them and their three beautiful daughters. We all had a blast.

Monday- We went to a waterpark I was dumb enough to go down a couple of the slides with the 3 big boys that are my brothers-in-law and my husband. I was so scared, I couldn't even laugh. All I could do was hold onto the tube and repent of all my sins. Nate wasn't as tough as he thought he was the next day when his sunburn manifested itself.
The waterpark was followed by a Korean dinner. Yummy! I tried something called donkyass (no it's not pronounced the way it's spelled and it has nothing to do with donkey's or @sses). It was seriously heaven on a plate.

Tuesday- Frank, Hil and Darby left (tear), I was so sad. So was Nate, he didn't have anyone near as fun to play with as Darby.
We went to Dustins area (he's in the Border Patrol) and checked out the trails left by illegal immigrants. The roads were so twisted that I started getting car sick then to top it off, I had to go to the bathroom. I ended up running up one of the trails out of view of the boys, hoping there were no aliens hiding in the bushes admiring my rear end.
Then we went to the dog beach and threw the ball for Lilly and Bear.

Wednesday- Sea World!! That was fun. Jess had to work so Dustin, Cindy, Nate, Grandma Claire and I went. My favorite was the beluga wales and the shark exhibit.

As always, Nate is thrilled to pose with me.
Cindy, Dustin, and Grandma Claire waiting for the Shamu Show to begin


Brothers, not only unafraid to show affection to one another in public, but if you look closely you'll see Dustin holding a purse...



My cool beluga whale picture, I think we really bonded.
Maybe I'll be a beluga while trainer when I grow up.


Nate and Dustin in the polar bear caves.
Nate's a little scared but Dustin will protect him.


Thursday- We went back to the beach with the plan to rent one surf board and see if Dustin, Nate or I had a untrained gift for surfing. Luckily Aunt Kelly came to spend the day with us. She brought her surf boards and wetsuits and gave me a little lesson: Surfing 101.
And no, none of us had a gift. In fact, I didn't even have enough body strength or balance to push myself up on the surfboard. But I was dang good at laying on the board and catching a wave into shore.
I didn't put any sunscreen on my shoulders (I had a wetsuit on), I took my wetsuit off for 20 min to eat lunch, during that time my shoulders were fried.


This is a good picture of Nate and Dustin, I'm less

than thrilled about the way I look.
But thems the breaks!

I think this is a great picture of my surfing hunk of a
husband.

Friday- We said good-bye to the fam. I was so sad.

Thanks to Dustin and Jess for planning this whole thing. It was great!

The Sweet Days of Vacation

I'm so excited to share with you the fun we had in San Diego with Nate's family. I love them so much and am so glad to be a part of the family. I don't have time to go into details today (I'm trying to catch up at work). So I hope this cute video of Nate and our little niece, Darby, will work until I can get the rest of the vacation in order.
I love her little curly mullet. I asked Hil if they ever tried to put her hair in a ponytail. Hil said they tried but then Darby looks like a little colonial man. Hilarious!!!

Vacation is over. Now I need a vacation from my vacation!

I apologize in advance to those I may offend...

*Warning, the contents of this blog may not be suitable for anyone under 14 or with a weak stomach. The contents are disturbing and explicit.

So last night I waxed my bikini line. Not because I'll be showing up on the San Diego beach in a skimpy little black bikini, but because I will have to squeeze into a swimsuit sometime in the next week and I haven't been able to find a full body speedo that I can afford.
Have you ever had anything waxed? Do you know how hard it is to be standing half naked (ok, I was completely naked) in the bathroom with one foot on the toilet and trying to get up enough nerve to rip that little strip of cloth off your sensitive inner thigh. The mental stress it causes is almost (I said almost) more torture than the actual waxing. I stood there balancing on one foot trying to count down, 3,2,1 but then remembering how much the last one had hurt, I'd start counting all over again.
The bathroom door was closed but that didn't do much to muffle the screams coming out of my mouth as one of the strips of muslin slipped out of my fingers and I had to re-rip.
Of course Nate just said I should have shaved, but my skin is pretty sensitive in that area and if I shave, it's nice and smooth for all of 1 day followed by unattractive red bumps and me trying not to scratch in a very unlady-like manner. So now I'm walking slightly bow legged and still finding little bits of wax here and there.
Why, do you ask, did I put myself through such torture? We are going on vacation to San Diego this coming week where we will be spending time on the beach, at a water park, and a swimming pool or two. I might be able to beg of one swimsuit activity but I doubt I could come up with a good enough reason to avoid the rest of the blessed events.
So now that I'm reasonably hair free in most of the desired area, my next dilemma is how to avoid drawing attention to my pasty, dumpy rear-end. Remember my swimsuit disaster? Well I still haven't found a magic swimsuit that would lift, tone and tan my generous booty. I've done some squats and lunges in between bites of cake and Popsicles but for some reason, I've haven't seen a single butt dimple disappear. Can't figure out why... And so, now here I am, one day until we fly out and all I can do is eat a bag of twizzlers while I despair over not having a swimsuit and not wanting to wear one if I did find "the one."
Last night watching the women's gymnastics I couldn't help but envy the perfectly chiseled tooshie of Nastia Liukin who won the gold. Would I exchange a tight little bum for the neck of a football player, I believe I would. Yes, I believe I would indeed.

And so now I will end my tale of the waxed bikini line and the sagging honky-tonk bidonki-donk. And if you happen to be on the beach in San Diego and see this:

Know that it's not mine, I'm on the other beach probably sitting next to this guy:

so that I feel a little bit better about myself.

Rare sighting of the Flat-Chested-Getto-Booty Bird

Aramie talked about her pink bird, I too found a bird...

I'm humiliated! My life has been one of ease and unconcern. Yesterday my carefree world was shattered when I tried on this:

The cutest swimsuit ever. I carefully shopped around, looking for the perfect style, checked the measurements and finally bought it online. As I shimmied into it I could tell right away that something wasn't right. The top fit nicely, it made my flat chest look...well...bigger. Slimmed down my waist. As I looked in the mirror I congratulated myself on my purchase. I slowly turned around, checking out every possible angle to see where I might need to do an extra crunch or squat and making sure there weren't any bulges. When to my horror, I had turned to the point where I say my pasty white backside oozing (and I mean OOZING) out of my suit.
In that moment I realized the real meaning of getto-booty. Nate tried to comfort me as I tearfully showed him what I had been trying to hide our whole marriage, my big-bum. He said it didn't look too bad, then he said it was a really cute (yes, Nate uses the word cute) swimsuit.
Now my dilemma is: do I just wear a two piece and throw a tank top over it or do I go for the next size up and hope that my chest finally catches up to my rear?
CALLING FELLOW BIG-BOOTY WOMEN: We don't need to be ashamed, I just need advice. Any suggestions??