I took a laxative last night for the first time in my life. I should be the anti-Activia spokesperson (sorry Jamie Lee, but I will take you down). In fact I usually pop Immodium like tic-tacs. "Regularity" has never been a problem for me which has been a blessing and a retched curse.
Something changed last night and with a concerned Nate at my side, I considered taking half of a laxative. The box said results 6 to 12 hours.
"Ok," I thought to myself "it's 10:00 pm now. Church starts at 10:00 am. My body will probably react 10 minutes after I take the the pill. Laxative is a go."
I then proceeded to take the pill-o-Satan.
10 minutes passed, nothing. Went to bed ( I have to be totally honest with you all, I had the tiniest fear that an issue would arise while I slept). Woke up this morning, nothing. Prepared for church, nothing. Maybe my body was immune to laxative. That's like a superhero kind of power isn't it? (My mind drifts for a moment, bare with me my friends, as I think about what my superhero name would be. "The Commodian" was all I could come up with. I welcome any other names."
Dressed in our finest, we leave for church at 9:30 with no signs of problems.
10:00, and church has begun. The laxative has left my mind as I sing a hymn and listen to a prayer.
Before the hour is up I will be home after the longest drive of my life. In between curses I prayed that I wouldn't get pulled over by a policeman, that wouldn't end up well for anyone involved.
I shall now spend the rest of my evening writing a strongly worded letter to the laxative company and file a complaint. Apparently there was a misprint on the box. It should say:
"results in 6 to 12 1/2 hours."